MUMMY ACHE
'TOMB' MUCH HOGWASH
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Last updated: 7:48 am
August 1, 2008
Posted: 12:37 am
August 1, 2008
WHICH is the most shocking transformation in "The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor"? Is it when a dead warrior transforms himself into a three-headed dragon? How about when skeletons arise out of their tomb in the Great Wall of China to turn into columns of soldiers from the Ray Harryhausen brigade? Or is it the way Rachel Weisz has turned into Maria Bello?
PHOTO GALLERY: The Mummy: Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor
This Mummy is an ancient emperor (Jet Li) whose rampage ended when he was turned to stone by the curse of a benevolent witch (Michelle Yeoh). Looking for his remains in 1946 China is Alex (Luke Ford), the archaeologist son of Rick O'Connell (Brendan Fraser). By coincidence, the senior O'Connell is tricked into going to China on a diplomatic mission to return a giant diamond.
Rick's wife, Evelyn, is now played by Bello, although under new hair and makeup she manages to look neither like Weisz nor herself. I call foul for illegal substitution; this kind of thing smelled bad when TV's "Bewitched" tried it, and now that it's been rotting for 40 years it hasn't gotten any fresher. Why not just say that the Weisz character died in the 13 years since the last episode and give Rick a new girl? The Evelyn character isn't the same anyway; no longer a feminine scholarly type, she's now so fired-up and combat-ready that she's more like Steven Seagal in pumps.
Rick and Evelyn join their son, the immortal witch, Evelyn's sidekick brother (John Hannah) and his son's girl (Isabella Leong), who is also the witch's daughter and is also immortal.
After the emperor busts out of his stony shell, the gang must stop him first from climbing up a mountain to find the way to Shangri-La. Then they must prevent him from making himself immortal by taking a dip in Shangri-La's pool, which is apparently even more exclusive than the one on top of Soho House.
