Rating:
January 10, 2007 -- MAYBE they should have called it "Armed & Stu pid."

Yes, just when you thought they couldn't reach lower down into the M-list celebrity junk pile for the formerly famous to star in what can only be termed one of the stupidest ideas in reality TV to date - they did.

The result is "Armed & Famous," a show starring recycled reality show regulars Erik Estrada, unforgettable in that Shakespearean epic, "Surreal Life 2;" Jack Osbourne, a guy who jumps reality shows faster than Paris Hilton jumps men; skateboarding reality star Jason "Wee-Man" Acuna, of "Jackass unreality TV star Trish Stratus of WWE; and LaToya Jackson, whose entire life has been totally and completely unreal.

The premise - unreal in and of itself - is that these five celebs train for three weeks to become cops in Muncie Indiana, and then go out with real Muncie cops (most of whom look like reality show stars) on calls.

How ridiculous is it all? Suffice to say that the local news stories generated about the show were far better than what ends up on-air. Take these precious nuggets:

"Former 'ChiPs' star Erik Estrada got into an expletive-laced shouting match with a wounded community activist shortly after the man called him Emilio Estevez amid the filming of a reality television show."

Or: "La Toya Jackson failed to complete enough push-ups to pass a physical fitness assessment in becoming a Muncie police officer . . . "

Gee, they forgot to show us that part.

Not to say that the show doesn't have its moments which, although few and far between, do exist.

At one point, Estrada, armed with his "ChiPs" face says, "The other cadets had never done a cop show - I did Poncherello for six years. So over them, I had a tremendous advantage!" Huh?

It's also fun to see each of them get hit with a 50,000-volt Taser, which apparently is mandatory before being allowed to carry one.

Luckily, they don't direct the Tasers at the women's chests, or there might have been a tragic silicone explosion with worldwide consequences.

LaToya collapses; the lady wrestler almost collapses; Osbourne bleats; Wee-man takes it like a man; and Estrada, (again!) first commands, "Do it!" and then begins screaming like a bad actor on an over-done Spanish soap (which he was), yelling "Aaaaghgghgh! Aaaaagghghg!" Stop!"

He later informs us, "One of my testicles has enlarged from getting Tasered!" Ahh, that's too much information, hon.

And really, how much of this kind of reality can any of us take?

"Armed & Famous" Tonight at 8 on CBS

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