Consider the Colosseum the Meadowlands of ancient Rome. If it was sport, if it was brutal, if it reddened the earth, it was sure to go down inside this giant elliptical blood bowl in front of 50,000 fans. Completed around 80 AD, it was an active amphitheater for half a millennium, hosting everything from gladiator games, to wild animal hunts to Christian executions. An earthquake in 1329 destroyed a good portion of it before thieves stripped much of the stone from the interior. But a $20 million renovation in the '90s helped the restored stadium become one of the New Seven Wonders Of The World. It's open daily from 9 a.m. to 1 hour before sunset (free; Piazza del Colosseo).

The Pantheon, on the other hand, is imperial Rome's best-preserved building, built circa 125 AD. Believers say, "Of course, it was a temple blessed by the gods." Mathematicians say, "Of course, it's because the diameter of the Pantheon's dome is equal to distance between its oculus and the floor." Either way, the only thing that's really changed about the Pantheon is who exactly is being worshipped inside - originally it was intended for Mars, Jupiter and the rest of the Roman immortals. But since the seventh century it's been redecorated for Jesus (free, 8:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m. M-Sat.; Piazza della Rotonda).

Who's the true artist behind the Trevi Fountain - Benini or Nicolas Salvi? Who cares? The aquatic monuments rocks in a very H.P. Lovecraftian kind of way - Oceanus and his Tritons try to tame two monstrous hippocamps (sea horses) poised to lunge forth and rip apart any crook who dares steal any of the 3,000 euro coins that are tossed in the fountain every day (Piazza di Trevi).

It's a shame a handful of those deadly sins prevent the Pope from doing an episode of MTV's Cribs. Maybe it's for the best -- St. Peter's Basilica, his Vatican City crib that doubles for the world's largest church, is something that's best beheld in person. Its dome, rising some 435 feet in the air, is how you identify it along the skyline. But most interesting is what's found beneath the floors of the Basilica - there lies at least 100 entombed bodies (mostly popes and Catholic royalty) and vast treasures ranging from medallions and statues to holy relics of unknown value. And that's not including the cathedral's various masterpieces worth - literally -- god knows how much (Piazza San Pietro).

LA PERGOLA

No longer a bratty child of antiquity, modern Rome is secure enough to handle a German running the best restaurant in town. At this mountaintop hotel eatery, Chef Heinz Beck has learned to serve up some serious Italian haute cuisine - lobster in orange sauce, baked lamb, shellfish and truffles, shrimp pasta tagliolini. Even if Pergola stopped serving food, the place might still hold on to that #1 spot in virtue of its view. Perched way up on Monte Mario, you're able to take in everything - if you can't get a table on the terrace, a window seat is mandatory (in the Cavalieri Hilton, Via Cadlolo 101).

SUPPERCLUB

Purists probably shuddered at the news that the Supperclub - the international chain of metropolitan nightclub/restaurants famous for providing a DJ'd, shoeless, beds-for-tables dining experience usually set in some surreal, futuristic aesthetic - was coming to town. But there's something about eating oddball food, drinking high-priced liquor, and getting massaged by your waitress - a hedonistic orgy enjoyed all while sprawled out on a bed - that's especially reminiscent of Roman Senate life (Via de'Nari 14).

DAL BOLOGNESE

Average demographic of this classic eatery by the Spanish Steps: model/movie star/famous artist/Forbes CEO centerfold. But don't let that scare you away - if you're fast enough, you can beat them to a table on the sidewalk. Multi-pasta plates, green lasagna and veal cutlet plates fill the stomachs of those lucky enough to pull it off (Piazza del Popolo 1).

ALEPH

Sick of the city's ubiquitous goody-goody Papal vibe? This 96-room design hotel balances the scales, adopting Dante's Divine Comedy/Circles of Hell theme over anything more salvational (though, there's a little Heaven mixed in with the Hell - Paradise Spa, for one). Red and black walls, devil horns for clothes hooks and other goofy touches explain why the place is popular with the kids -- well-to-do kids, anyway. In-room high-speed, to boot (from $438; boscolohotels.com).

RESIDENZA PAOLO VI

Within this former monastery (which the Vatican still claims as an external property), celibacy is probably the last thing still being practiced, what, with Residenza's sexy-times-infinity panoramic views of St. Basilica and Bernini's colonnade. A further blessing: there's free WiFi in every room (from $263; residenzapaolovi.com).

LORD BYRON HOTEL

Named for the great poet/Carbonari leader, this Borghese Gardens-adjacent, 32-room villa-turned-hotel is a throw back to 1930s-era art deco, but laced with modern touches. A tenured member of Small Hotels of the World, its marble bathrooms, spacious rooms, perfect location and free WiFi make it worth the hefty price tag (from $466; lordbyronhotel.com).

Flights:

The Rome Leonardo da Vinci Fiumicino Airport (FCO), Alitalia's sole hub about 20 miles from the city's center, is fresh off the opening of its new terminal 5 (where we now fly in). Most noticeable is its heavy-duty security force - the good guys are in camo holding the AKs - due in large part to a spate of hijackings the airport saw in the 70s and 80s. Despite the large number of passengers (FCO saw just under 33 million passengers in 2007), you'll find the airport surprisingly convenient. Both Delta (delta.com) and American (aa.com) offer 8.5-hour daily nonstop service from JFK, as does Continental out of Newark (continental.com).

Once you land, the easiest way to get into town is via half-hour express train that leaves every 30 minutes between 6 a.m. and midnight (a one-way ticket is a little over $17). Choose a cab instead and prepare for $63 sticker shock.

In a twist of fate sure to confuse, there is a second int'l airport in the area, Ciampino International, on via Leonardo Da Vinci. But it's only served by European airlines (many of them low-fare). Feel free to connect through it if you'd like - it's technically closer to the city's center (but not connected directly by train).

For more info, visit www.romaturismo.it.

Ground transportation:

Short of a death wish, you do not want to drive Rome. And even if you did, it's not very easy to do (legally) -- non-residents are barred from driving on the 22 downtown streets that comprise the "Limited Traffic Zone" during business hours unless they're given a special permit.

Instead, make good use of the two-line metro which runs between 5:30 a.m and 11:30 p.m. every day (an hour later on Saturdays). Metro A stops at Cipro (Vatican Museums), Ottaviano (S. Pietro), Lepanto (Via Cola di Rienzo shopping), Flaminio (Piazza del Popolo), Spagna and Barberini (Fontana di Trevi). Metro B stops at the Basilica di S. Paolo, the Pyramid of Caius Cestius, the Colosseum and Roman Forum.

Everywhere else can be reached by a vast bus network. Check www.atac.roma.it for route and fare info.

Local lingo:

Come here in August, and you'll find one phrase plastered throughout the city: Chiuso per ferie - closed for the holidays. That's when most of the city closes down shop for a month.